One of my biggest goals as a mother is to understand my daughter as best I can. Not only do I want to a good mother, I want to be the kind of mother she needs. I want to be able to be flexible to meet her needs and in the her unique ways. I don’t want to just randomly pick a parenting style or technique because some expert said it is the best, or because it’s easier for me, I want to parent in the way that is best for her and makes her feel the most safe and loved. All kids are different, which is why there isn’t just one parenting technique, or healthy diet, or lifestyle that is perfect for everyone.
At the end of the day, if my child does not feel loved then I have failed as a parent. This can be where all sorts of issues crop up that are blamed on parenting, but nobody can understand why the kid is having issues or acting out since the parents so clearly are good people and love their child. It’s because the child never actually felt understood and loved, and they were not parented in the unique to them way they needed to be.
In order to parent the way my child needs me to parent (I need to do lots of personal growth and healing work) , I need to get to know my child on a personal level, and also on a spiritual and energetic level as well. I need to pay close attention, heighten my observation skills a be fully present when I am around her.
Thankfully, there are lots of ways to get to know your child better. You can pick and choose what feels best for you, but here are some of my favorite tools in my toolbox for understanding my child to the best of my ability.
Ayurvedic wisdom will give you clues about their body type, constitution and personality. The book the 5 Love Languages of Children will help you figure out your child’s love language. For example, if your child’s love language is touch but you are not a touchy-feely person and you never give hugs or hold hands, but instead you constantly doling out verbal praise, then your kid may not feel loved because verbal praise is not what makes your kid feel loved, it might be hugs-which your kid is sorely missing just because it’s uncomfortable for you to show love in that way (same goes for your spouse!).
Another way to get to know your child is through astrology. I am Catholic, but I like astrology and think it offers good insights if taken with a grain of salt and the right perspective. I believe God created the stars and planets the laws of the universe, and I think that working with Christian astrologists is aok. I have not only gotten Penelope’s astrological birth chart done, but one for the little trinity of my family unit as well.
But the most interesting way I have learned to get to know my daughter better is through Chinese Face Reading. I don’t remember what pulled my attention to Chinese face reading, but I bought a kindle copy of a book called The Wisdom of Your Child’s Face: Discover Your Child’s True Nature with Chinese Face Reading last year and devoured it. It is probably one of the most interesting books I have read in the last five years. It was totally fascinating how dead on the book is about my personality, my husband’s and my daughter’s. It really shed a bright light into some areas of our personalities, and how our personalities interacted with each other, that I had never even considered before.
This book shows how every quality that is revealed through your face has strengths and challenges, and how to move in harmony with the natural patterns imprinted on your face and in your energy. Ultimately, you’ll learn the importance of helping your child be secure in who they are, and allowing the space to be their true selves and fully let their spirit shine.
People joke that your children don’t come with a user’s manual, but they do! It’s written in their faces and all you have to do is learn to read them. The secrets of your children’s inner nature and personal potential are eloquently inscribed in the curve of their cheeks, the shape of their eyes, the contour of their brows, and the unique language of their original design.
Chinese face reading is based on ancient Taoist principles that teach that each child is born with a soul’s intent, a blueprint that is theirs and theirs alone, and this inner architecture is reflected in their outer design. When you can read your children’s faces, you can discover their true nature. You can understand what their special gifts are, see where their personal challenges will be, and how to guide them through these issues. You’ll be able to recognize what they need from you in order to feel safe and loved, and you’ll be empowered as a parent to raise them with less stress, more joy, and the confidence that you’re helping them fulfill their special purpose in the world!
For example, the dimple in my daughter’s right cheek showed her natural charm, her plump lower cheeks shows her kindness and strong opinons, her rounded forehead shows her stong imagination and intuition.
My rounded eyebrows show my tendency towards being a people-pleaser and my indented temples indicated my compulsive tendencies and my square chin reveals my love of all things practical.
My husband’s prominent cheek bones show his authoritative nature and that his earlobes are attached to his head reveal a life long attachment to his family (this is SO my husband, he can be a total jerkface but he is THE most loyal family man-and FYI, my ear lobes are not attached and shows my ability to separate myself from my family and be independent).
I was so interested in learning more about Chinese Face Reading and learning more about the true nature of my child that I emailed the author, Jean Haner, and asked her for an interview. She graciously agreed and shed even more light! Click play below to hear the audio of our talk, you will learn a lot more about me and my family and about how Chinese Face Reading works.